Common Sense and a Slice of Pie...

Well after some time off from the grind of prison life, I am back and can't help but post a typical session with the nutty inmates. Inmate Wilson decides that she's, "Mad as Hell, and I not gonna take it anymore." So she takes a razor to her right forearm. Now mind you she has a history of self-inflicted behavior. Anyway, off she goes to the infirmary for a check up and placement of suicide watch. Standard Operating Procedure (SOP). This event takes place at 10:00am, and now it's almost 1:00pm. All this time, this inmate is sitting in a holding cell, awaiting treatment and evaluation.

Ms. Wilson mentions that she is hungry, and that she has not eaten since 6:30 in the morning. She makes a simple request for a box lunch. Now in all my experience working with felons, I have learned that you don't mess with food or mail, that is a fact, and that is all that needs to be said. Her requests fall upon deaf ears. She makes another request, politely and with respect, again she is ignored. As you could very well imagine we have many badge heavy guards.

Well as this is going on, the inmate continues to watch the guards and medical staff enjoy pizza that had been purchased and delivered. Well you see the train a coming, rolling 'round the bend. The inmate is watching this with a hungry belly and a slightly off center mindset. All of the anger of her respectful request to eat comes to a head, and POW! off she goes. She races into the room with all the pizza, and does her best re-enactment of the famous Animal House food fight. Pizza is being tossed about. On the floors and walls, the windows and doors, the pizza is being tossed by the now crazed inmate. When all of the pizza had been destroyed, she sits back down and waits for her shot of mind-numbing narcotics.

All of this could have been avoided if someone would have given the convict a sandwich. But as you can tell, that would have been an act of kindness in some eyes. That is not how I see it. Every inmate is entitled to a box lunch, that is not a privilege, but a right. The guards who see feeding the inmate as being weak, ended up $71.00 in the hole, and had to give the convict a lunch anyway.

As they say on ESPN, "Winner, Winner, chicken dinner." PRISON!